thinkJAZZ.

you see the world in black & white

Visitor number:

02 February 2011

Alot of things has happened lately I don’t even know where to start.

1. Bryan’s birthday was awesome. Christis whipping cream failed but Greenfields saved me (why am I even surprised)

2. CNY celebration cum Street sale in school today was crazy. FROZEN BANANAS AND MARSHMALLOW BUNNIES HAHAHA. oh god. But we had fun packing the stuff lol. :P

3. iPad extended screen on Air Display app is FORMIDABLE. I ought to do a review on this and send it to some tech site for money or something

4. Sleeping Buddha likes mushrooms

5. Q is all real numbers

Anyway aside from that, I guess I was quite affected with all the negativity and rubbing in. But then again, the hard part is standing up, and I can stand up. So I’ve decided that all I will do is just be calm, emotionless and all, and not let it affect me. Oh and Ken, if you’re reading this, no, I’m not being emo. It’s more like a self actualization thingy. I don’t know why I try so hard since I always fail, ~~and I’m already on the verge of giving up~~, correction: I have given up. Sam’s words of wisdom really helped, so thanks Sam (: She was right about me having no obligation whatsoever, and I guess it’s true. It’s great to have someone who understands you as your closest classmate ;) and she did a really great job with the Marshmallow bunnies so kudos to her. But anyway, it’s like this entirely different side of me takes over whenever I’m in that situation… it’s… so unlike the person who laughs at things like mushrooms… I guess if you’re there to actually observe, it’s quite a drastic change, like from white to black. Suddenly, everything has lost its meaning. It’s like still eccentric, but so differently eccentric. I’m always on a different wavelength, and it’s like I’m not appreciated because of it. Well, the thing is, I’m not going to put on a fake front, OR not be myself, just to you know, fit in… call me ego, but whatever I love myself the way I am. I’m sure of it. I don’t need people to tell me how awesome I am. And the fact that I’m not appreciated by EVERYONE just makes me more special. I feel like I’m ahead, forward looking. Well no one appreciated Ravel much. and Ravel is like the most ingenius and diverse composer I know of. I think the weirdest people always turn out to be really great people, so I’ll live with that.

I’ve always felt like I’m meant to do something great. Ok I know it’s starting to sound a little dramatic and cliche and book-ish. But I don’t know… I don’t think I’m meant to just have a boring job like a doctor or an engineer... anyway I only have a few minutes till CNY so I should get a move on with New year resolutions :P